In the last year or so, I’ve been checking out some blogs that feature the subject of FLR and/or DD where the wife or female partner in the relationship is the Head of Household or domestic disciplinarian. On this topic, there are so many interesting aspects to explore, it is hard to know where to start. One idea that comes up a lot is how partners in this dynamic reconcile competing motivations that involve satisfying a kink and applying effective punishment. How do we separate penalty from reward? One possible solution for some is to look for punishments that fail to satisfy the kink. If spanking or other embarrassments are causing an erection, then try something dry or utilitarian like chores, grounding and loss of privileges. This may deflate his enthusiasm in the moment. If her control is the turn on, the kink is alive and well, but if he needs the spanking as punishment, what keeps the desire for DD alive? We are all different, and I don’t know how others feel about it but, for m...